BLOOD FOR DRACULA (1974)

This last Sunday my old lady and I went to the beach. It was a mellow, romantic affair. We held hands and strolled along the shore running into various pieces of vitriolic splendor. First was the rotting corpse of a seagull, then the pile of excrement so large that I couldn't tell if it came from man or beast, and lastly as we finished our search for sea glass, we were lucky enough to find a spoon. The spoon was bent and rusty with a multitude of tiny scrapes lining it's bowl. It was a cooker for drawing up skag.

Welcome to Oxnard Shores.

That junkie spoon got me thinking though. I was reminded of the numerous junkie related films I've seen, which got me thinking about the seedy urban underbelly films of Paul Morrissey, TRASH in particular, which in turn led me to thinking about my favorite Paul Morrissey film, BLOOD FOR DRACULA (aka ANDY WARHOL'S DRACULA), a junkie film in a different vein to say the least.

Paul Morrissey usually gets glossed over by the mainstream. Thanks to his working relationship with Andy Warhol and the Facorty all of his early films got saddled with Warhol's name in top billing as a sort of Warhol seal of approval. A move that despite creating confusion in the general public over who made the films, I'm sure made sense at the time. Warhol was a legitimate celebrity, and getting his name attached to your project generally meant more eyes on you. Just ask The Velvet Underground. However, the fact of the matter was after Warhol got shot by Valerie Solanas in 1968 (see I SHOT ANDY WARHOL), he had very little to do with filmmaking leaving collaborator, Paul Morrissey, to pick up the Factory filmmaking reigns. Suddenly under Morrissey the Factory films became less experimental/ minimal and more mainstream in terms of style and narrative structure, while still maintaining a focus on characters of the underground as seen in FLESH, TRASH and HEAT.

Since collecting 50% of the profits was Morrissey's only form of payment in working on these films, as time went on his projects ended up becoming more and more commercial. The pinnacle of this move to commercialism came in 1973 when Morrissey remade two classic horror films back to back in FLESH FOR FRANKENSTEIN and BLOOD FOR DRACULA.

BLOOD FOR DRACULA revolves around Count Dracula and his comical/ pathetic quest for pure virgin blood in a world overwrought by impure sexual promiscuity. The thickly accented cast is headed by that chihuahua of a man, Udo Kier, in the lead as Dracula. Udo ends up being pitted against Joe Dellesandro's usual New York beefcaked-ness as the Marxist handyman, Mario, who ends up serving as the protector of the family that Dracula is trying to infiltrate.

SYNOPSIS:

Count Udo sits at a mirror applying black die to his silver hair and red gloss to his lifeless lips. Sickly and pale, he has no reflection, but his vanity remains.

I see a red door, and I want it painted black.

Anton, the butler, brings Dracula his sister. She is sick and weak and needs to be kept in the crypt with the rest of his family. A fate that may befall Dracula if he doesn't get the blood of a virgin (pronounced: wehr-gin) soon. It seems that finding wehr-gin is proving to be more and more difficult for Anton. Dracula is simply too creepy and weird for the local folk to handle, and no one in Romania will entrust their daughter to him. Time to outsource! They decide to take a trip to Italy. Since the country is predominantly Catholic, there should be no trouble finding wehr-gin there. ~ZING~! Also his status as a Romanian Count would be impressive to most. Dracula gets bummed that he can't take his old books, stuffed birds and dried flowers with him though. ~WEIRDO~! You get the impression that the rich lazy Count wouldn't know how to wipe his own ass if it wasn't for Anton.

That day Anton and Dracula, in the world's hairiest vulture-esque coat, head off for Italy by motorcar with a coffin strapped to their roof. So much for not looking like a weirdo. Let it be known that the sun does no damage to Dracula in this movie, but he is annoyed by its brightness.

Batmobile.

In Italy we meet the Di Fiore family. There's Esmerelda: the pious homely one, Rubinia and Saphiria: the young slutty ones and Perla: the innocent teen. While tending the garden with Perla, Rubinia and Saphiria decide to whip their tits out. Why? Does it really matter? Perla makes a stink, which forces their snooty bellowing regal mother to put a stop to the exhibitionism. Then Dellesandro and his thick New York accent drop by as the houseboy, Mario. He wants to know if he'll be seeing the girls later, but for what ever for?

Better Homes and Gardens.

At a local inn Anton and Dracula arrive. The owners can't help but react to Dracula's odd malnourished appearance. Anton works some recon on the owners explaining Dracula's situation and his need for a wehr-gin wife. The owners recommend the Di Fiore family, who have a big house and thus, must be religious.

In Dracula's room the count bitches and moans about the accommodations. He can't even get good vegetables here and has to settle for Romaine lettuce. Not only that, but he's all out of cheese too! He's such a baby. Anton ensures that all of the Count's pain will not come without reward because Anton will make sure the Di Fiores will provide him with a bride. The Count's hunger pains then lead him into some nice spasmatic convultions like a junkie getting the DT's.

Dracula pays me to make this face at all times.

Back at the Di Fiores, Mother has gotten word of the Count's interest in her daughters, and her and Papa Di Fiore talk over how great it would be to marry into some wealth. It turns out that their estate is falling apart, as they are almost destitute despite living in such grand fashion. Papa Di Fiore talks with an OG Dracula accent for some reason. When Anton arrives, the Fiores are receptive to the idea of meeting Dracula and talk him into bringing the Count over to stay at their place instead of the inn. Anton lets them know of Dracula's little peccadillos, so they're not shocked at his weirdness.

Later at the local tavern Anton tries to get some local dirt on the Di Fiores. An old woman and a young girl don't have much to say, but a table of men who used to be the Di Fiores' field workers bury the Di Fiores for not paying them for their work. Anton tries to get more information from them but gets caught up in a game of copy cat with a mustachioed Roman Polanski. After losing to Polanski, a car accident occurs outside and the young girl with the old woman is left bleeding. Anton conceals a loaf of bread and leaves.

13 year olds, dude.

Later in Dracula's room Anton returns with the loaf of bread soaked in blood. It turns out that when Anton went to check on the injured girl, he pretended to faint at the sight of the blood. While on the ground he used the bread to sop up the blood like a sponge. Dracula feasts on the bread intimately eating and drinking the blood. He now has enough strength to meet the Di Fiores.

At the Di Fiores Papa and Mama Di Fiore layout Dracula's impending arrival and intentions to their daughters. After, the daughters lament their future already believing that Dracula must be a weirdo to not land a wife in his home country.

Later that night Mario bangs Saphiria and Rubinia just because he can. Tits and ass on parade. After, Saphiria lays out her plan to marry Dracula for his money and take Rubinia with her. She also wants to take Mario as her butler/sex slave, but Mario calls bullshit on that. He's been boning up on Marxism and the communist revolution among other things, and knows it's only going to be a matter of time before the working class rises up and wipes out all the rich fat cats. The sisters scoff at Mario's commie pipe dreams. To which he replies, "I'm tired of you two tramps. Whatta bout your lil sista' ? What does she do all night? I'd like to rape the hell outta her." BOLDNESS~! There's nothing like having a character come out and flat out say he wants to rape your underage sister. The sisters shoot down that idea and while Mario freshens up, the sisters start lezzing out on each other. ~Hot~?

Lesbian incest, when tastefully done, can be a beautiful thing.

The next day Dracula arrives in all his queerness. The sisters aren't that impressed. While settling in, Mario and Anton get into a little tiff when Anton tries to boss Mario around. Mario asserts that he isn't a servant. Later Shaphiria meets up with Mario in his shack for a nooner. She complains about Dracula being ugly. Mario lets her know that after the revolution Dracula won't be rich and ugly anymore, but just ugly. He then gets fed up with her moaning and moves in to rape her. She doesn't want it, but then professes her love for Mario. How can you hate fuck someone when they tell you that they love you? Mario kicks her out for killing the mood.

Saphiria complains more to Mother about the count. She doesn't trust him, but the mother is still bent on marrying into some money, so she sends Saphiria up to the Count with some food. Alone with the Count, Saphiria lies about her virginity, Dracula grills her for the truth feeling her up in the process. Still she lies. Believing her, Dracula goes for it and gets on with the necking, but the milks gone bad. Dracula gets green in the gills and proceeds to violently puke up a storm in the bathroom. ~AWESOME~!

All the while, Mario kicks it with Rubinia... naked. Softcore ensues. They wax over classism mid-coitus. Rubinia is a spoiled rich bitch, so Mario gives it to her like a spoiled rich bitch.

The next day, Saphiria lets her mom know that Dracula doesn't want her because she's not a virgin. Mommy's appalled, but at least she still has Rubinia. Later in the kitchen Dracula gets impressed by Esmerelda's bookishness. While Mario takes the Count back to his room, the two engage in a war of words over the class struggle. Mario knows that his time will come. Dracula hears enough and has another pathetic blood fit as he goes up the stairs.

My kind of communist party.

Later in Mario's commie pleasure palace, hello hammer and sickle paint job, Mario is in the midst of giving Rubinia another naked roll. Rubinia lets Mario know that Dracula is obsessed with marrying a virgin. His response, "This I didn't know. So what's he doin' with you two hoo-ers?" ~GOLD~! Rubinia doesn't agree with the "hoo-er" thing, but that doesn't stop Mario from slapping her around and forcing her to give him some head.

Bo Jackson. Billy Joel. Bon Jovi...

After the oral rape, Rubinia prepares to meet Dracula and cleans up (full frontal) in the bath, all the while teaching Perla the fine art of the whore. Perla doesn't think promiscuity is right, but Rubinia assures her that as long as you clean yourself up in between men, then it's all good. Words to live by. Perla also asserts that she hasn't been bonked by Mario, so she's still a virgin.

Now with Rubinia in the romantic confines of Dracula's bathroom, Dracula goes back into virgin interrogation mode. He lets it be known that his former wife was bookish and not extravagant. Rubinia holds up her virgin facade until she notices Dracula's lack of reflection, but it's too late. Dracula puts the bite on, and you tell with the heavy breathing and light humping that it's the closest thing Dracula gets to sex. But Rubinia's a whore, so the results are the same.

Vomitus Maximus.

Rubinia now zombies about, and Anton comes to Drac's aid. Dracula moans, "My body can't take this treatment anymore. The blood of these whores is killing me!" I hear you , man.

The next morning Papa Di Fiore sets out on a "business" trip to London. He asserts that the whole daughter marriage thing will work out and leaves Momma to handle everything on her own. Inside Anton notifies Mother and Perla that Dracula will be leaving tomorrow without a bride thanks to Saphiria and Rubinia not being virgins. Before Anton leaves, he takes great interest in sweet innocent Perla. She may not be old enough for marriage, but virgin blood is virgin blood.

Axe but no body spray.

Outside Perla let's the wood chopping Mario know that he needs to help pack Dracula's car. Mario's pretty suspicious of Dracula and his weirdness. After Perla shows no understanding of sex talk, he tries to put the moves on her, but she isn't interested.

Inside, Dracula wheels about looking for some company - nice camera mount. He ends up buddying up with Esmerelda, who comes clean on the family's financial woes. It turns out they're almost destitute thanks to Papa's London gambling trips. The two get along like two weirdos in a pod.

At night Mario discovers that Dracula's coffin has been empty all along. Dracula had been trying to pawn the casket off as that of a dead relative he was taking back to Romania. Meanwhile the bitten whore sisters, check in on Perla. They hold her down and finger check her goody to confirm her virginity. They try to take her to Dracula, but she escapes and runs into Mario. Mario lets Perla in on Dracula being a virgin hungry vampire or as how he explains it, "a throwback to religious perverts in the middle ages." Perla doesn't understand, but Mario, the gallant protector that he is, has an idea, "You should lose that uh... virginity of yours." He proceeds to rape the hell out of her.

Hug it out, bitch.

Momma Di Fiore makes sure to break it up, but the deed has been done. As Dracula listens on, Mario gives Momma the truth on the Count, but she doesn't believe it. To prove himself Mario takes everyone to find the sisters. With everyone gone Dracula comes out of the shadows and bellies up to the small pool of deflowered virgin blood on the floor. He slurps it up. ~AWESOME~! Then Esmerelda shows up and Dracula gives his best sad puppy dog face. Nice.

Busted.

Mario and company now find Saphiria and Rubinia lightly dyking out on each other. They're under Dracula's power, but not vampires. Mario knows that it's time to kill Dracula. Then Esmerelda shows up and Mario doesn't even offer to devirginize her. HA! Mario heads off in search of his axe. Oh hey, and Dracula and Anton listened in on the whole thing.

So it's time to split, but Dracula can't leave without his coffin. Anton and Dracula try to carry it out, but before they get too far Mario smashes it with his axe. The chase is on, and Mario heads after Dracula. Anton tries to escape on his own, but gets cut off by Momma and her trusty pistol. After trying to sellout Dracula, Anton ends up stabbing Momma in the side and makes a break for it, but Mother still has enough left in her to fire off a few rounds and nail Anton in his dome piece. Soon enough Mario catches up to Dracula and hacks off an arm.

~GORE~!

Then another arm. Then a leg and another leg. The blood is plentiful as Dracula writhes around on the ground and hisses like an injured snake. Just as Mario sets off to use his axe handle as a stake, Esmeralda comes shrieking onto the scene. Turns out she was an old homely virign, and she's been turned. She pleads with Mario to spare the undead life of her new love, but like Mario gives a shit, Dracula's a blood sucking aristocrat, so he stakes him good and proper. Insane with grief, Esmerelda then impales herself onto the Count.

Got wood?

Perla wanders out to see the results, but what's done is done. The underclass has risen and overtaken the bourgeoisie. Mario then ushers Perla back into the estate and closes the door on this bloody tale.

REVIEW:

Let's here it for eurotrash! BLOOD FOR DRACULA has a lot going for it. It's a campy film filled with some bad but true acting. Everything is played straight though, so it works, and that's a testament to Morrissey because under any lesser director the film would have fallen on it's ass. The film is perfectly cast. Each actor has a natural thick accent, which makes the characters fun to listen to and to try and imitate. There's german, italian, british, french and god knows what else being heard with each only accentuating the foppishness of the aristocracy. Even Dellesandro's out of place New Yorker accent works in that it further sets his character apart as working class. Morrissey also throws so many exploitation elements at the screen that things never get boring. There's enough nudity and softcore to titillate, enough misogyny to be outraged by and enough blood and gore to fill a bathtub. Not only that, but if you want to get highbrow about it, you can always chew on the social commentary and flex your inner Marxist. Morrissey definitely covers all of his bases in this one and makes sure to hit it home with a stake in the heart.

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED for vampire heads, boobie lovers, commies and closet rapists.

Available on DVD and INSTANT NEFLIX.

BONUS:

There's some controversy surrounding the film regarding the input of known italian director, Antonio Marghereti (Cannibal Apocalypse). Early italian prints of BLOOD list him as director. He was noted to have been on set supervising and even filming some scenes with actors, but Morrissey was also there doing his thing as well. Some believe Marghereti to be the true director due to Marghereti not being a stranger to gore and due to Morrissey's sudden jump in cinematic style on FLESH and BLOOD, as Morrissey's earlier films were less polished and more subdued when it came to camera tricks. In Morrissey's defense his films could be expected to look different as he was working with a bigger budget and a crew of professionals supporting him, as opposed to his usual bare bones skeleton crew that he would use on earlier projects. A lot of the polish of the film can likely be attributed to the fact that he was working with a more accomplished cinematographer than himself, as well. IMDB lists Marghereti as an uncredited assistant director and second unit director. Meaning, he was more of a go between among Morrissey and the italian crew, and he shot pick up scenes with some of the non principal actors. Chances are the foreign investors stuck Marghereti with Morrissey just to make sure he didn't fuck anything up due to his inexperience. Udo also states that he was only ever directed by Morrissey.

TRUST (1990)

Hal Hartley is something of an unsung hero in the world of cinema. Even though he's had a career spanning 21 years and 11 feature films, he's never really had a mainstream hit to make him a name to your average ham and egger on the street. However, to most hardcore film geeks he's known for his philosophically sophisticated, low budget, romantic comedies, and to me TRUST is his masterpiece.

TRUST, the second film by Hal Hartley, stars Hartley mainstays Adrienne Shelly and Martin Donovan with an early role from SOPRANOS and NURSE JACKIE star, Edie Falco. Hal Hartley's site lays out the premise as such:

Maria is a self-centered teenage suburban brat, until she gets pregnant by her un-loving quarterback boyfriend and gives her father a fatal heart attack. Matthew is a rowdy and disillusioned computer engineer with a vicious temper. Disowned by her devastated mom, dumped by her boyfriend, and shunned by her friends, Maria wanders the streets and bumps into Matthew. These two exiles fall in together and set out trying to become a normal, domestic, suburban couple. But these troubled lives evolve in unexpected ways and Maria grows into a responsible person that few conventional notions of “ordinary” can contain.

The film is out of print on VHS and due to Republic Pictures film library now falling under the ownership of Paramount Motion Pictures Group, a division of Viacom and sub division of not giving a shit about this movie, there is no american DVD release. However, you can catch it on Instant Netflix, if you're so inclined. I was lucky enough to end up buying my local video store's VHS copy for just a couple bucks. To this day I'm still in shock as to why they would put out to pasture a copy of a film so rare and so good. One video store's trash another man's treasure, I suppose.

SYNOPSIS:

Does this lipstick make me look like a whore?

The film opens on money dependent Maria putting on some horrendous purple lipstick and getting read the riot act from her folks for dropping out of high school. Puffing on a cigarette, she tells her parents that she's going to be a mommy. All right, she's smoking for two now. Welcome to Long Island, folks. Her dad tries to kick her out of the house for being a tramp, but Maria retaliates with a bitch slap and leaves. Her dad takes the slap pretty hard and proceeds to drop dead. Cue the college radio rock 'n roll, here comes TRUST.

Heart's on the other side, lady.

At the local computer repair warehouse we find the slightly disheveled and highly annoyed Matthew Slaughter. We know this because he pushes over a computer box like it just gave him a dirty look. I like this guy's attitude. Matthew gets to work trudging away at repairing a computer monitor all the while smoking on a cigarette. Immediately, a superior comes over to give him some shit. Matthew tells him to drop dead. I still like this guy's attitude. After some back and forth on the cheapness of the products he's working on, Matthew gives up, shoves his boss' head in a vice -AWESEOME~!- and proceeds to quit, walking off like a bad ass. I really like this guy's style. Matthew Slaughter eats, sleeps and shits "FUCK YOU" attitude.

Not the scene from CASINO.

Back at the local high school, Maria let's her football jock/jerk boyfriend in on the status of his spilled seed. He's not exactly thrilled. His collapse at the idea of potential fatherhood is pretty funny, but he's a scumbag and proceeds to berate and blame Maria for the whole thing. You see, being a father doesn't mesh with his dreams of being a pro football player. So much for a husband pulling in a bitchin' salary. His berating comes close to reaching the standards of a sneering wrestling promo. What a heel.

Grrrrrr! Me boyfriend! Me hate babies! Grrrrrr!

Matthew makes it home, and we find out why this guy is such a surly bastard. It turns out he lives with his wormy dad, who's an even surlier bastard than he is! Not only that but his dad is a whip cracking, neat freak taskmaster that wants the bathroom clean AT ALL TIMES.

Be a man and look me in the beanie.

Matthew breaks the news about his recent unemployment and tastes a mighty backhand. He's bigger than his old man, but he just takes it. His dad belittles him for not being able to move out and make it on his own. Matthew threatens to move out, but the old man laughs it off and demands Matthew to clean the bathroom again.

Clean it like you mean it.

The bathroom is spotless, but Matthew does it anyway. Still it's not good enough for his psycho dad. So he cleans it again. This time accidentally leaving a cigarette on the sink. While his dad puts on a smile and helps out a neighbor, Matthew contemplates a hand grenade that he keeps in his jacket.

Been there.

Meanwhile at the day glow lolita clothing store, Maria thinks about buying some bitchin' tops, but stops short in the dressing room mirror perhaps realizing that the only thing her trashy clothes ever got her was knocked up. Later at the abortion clinic, Maria shares a drink with her local nurse practitioner and laments not realizing that all her boyfriend ever saw in her was her "cunt". Bummer. After having the preconceived notions of her relationship shattered, she acquiesces to not knowing anything in general.

Back at the Slaughter household, Mr. Slaughter finds the cigarette left in the bathroom and goes apeshit, busting into Matthew's room and roughing him up. Matthew calmly takes the beating and the blame. This is not a healthy relationship.

Lou Ferrigno called. He wants his gimmick back.

Maria finally makes it back home to find everyone in mourning. Her mother blames her for the death of her husband and kicks her out. Maria's best friend won't even take her in. Emotionally lost, she takes up a bench in front of a liquor store with another emotionally lost woman, who gives Maria five bucks. They each babble out into space about their problems at the same time, in a way that suggests that they're more talking to the world than to each other. The woman lost her child many years ago and now lives in crummy monotonous marriage. She's clearly going crazy. All the while, some biker broad leaves her baby sitting right next to them as she goes into the store.

Maria heads into the store and tries to cop some beer, but the owner is a creep and tries to blackmail her into giving him some sex or he'll rat her underage buying to the cops. Things almost get rapey, but luckily Maria jams a lit cigarette in the jerks eye and gets away with the beer. Outside the biker broad's baby is now missing, while the crazy housewife is nowhere to be seen.

Magic cigarette trick gone wrong.

Later that night while out walking around, Matthew decides to hold up in an abandoned house and further contemplate his grenade. There he finds Maria much like himself cold, alone and surly. After realizing that he's not out to jump her bones, she asks him for a place to sleep. With his dad out of town, the next day at Matthew's they confide in each other and share their suicidal tendencies. Matthew carries his dad's Korean War grenade around "just in case." They carry on like a married couple already criticizing each others habits.

While Matthew goes to a job interview, Maria sets to take a shower. At the interview Matthew storms into a small repair shop and matter of factly tosses Maria's ex-boyfriend out of his way. He tells the boss that he'll work for him, but won't fix TV's because it's the opium of the masses. Boss man can't work with that because TV's are the majority of his business. So Matthew bails and socks the mouthy counter guy in the gut for good measure - AWESOME~!

Kill your TV.

At home Maria is like a human tornado haphazardly making a mess everywhere, and shit gets real when Mr. Slaughter comes home and finds the house a disaster area. Maria introduces herself as a friend of Matthew's, but he calls bullshit on that because Matthew doesn't have any friends. Sad but true. Matthew arrives just in time to get slapped around some more. Maria can't believe it, and tries to stick up for Matthew, but Mr. Slaughter responds by kicking her out and throwing her wet washed clothes in the spilled muck on the ground - DICK MOVE~! Before leaving Maria puts on a dress she finds in a closet. I pray that Mr. Slaughter is also a cross dresser.

Matthew seeks some refuge in a bar. He again matter of factly punks out Maria's ex and even gut shots the rapey liquor store guy before taking a seat -AWESOME~! The whole bar is in awe of Matthew, as if he's a force of nature. The bartender immediately plays a tape of Matthew's preferred music. Then Maria's newly divorced sister, Peg (Edie Falco), starts giving him some lip. She sees a mountain she'd like to climb, and pins his ornery attitude on his lack of sex life. He almost ups and fucks her just to shut her up. Luckily, Maria shows up. The dress belonged to Matthew's mother. Damn, no cross dressing daddy. Maria doesn't want Matthew to go back to his dad's abuse, so she offers to take him in. He declines, but reconsiders when Maria asks for his support in confronting her mom.

At Maria's her mom is busy pounding some gin. When Maria arrives, with carving knife in hand mommy promises to make Maria's life that of indentured servitude. She also offers to feed her. Maria catches her family up to speed on Mr. Rapey, the missing baby incident and her trip to the abortion clinic. Maria doesn't want to call the cops on the lady because she seemed so sad and mixed up. She also wants to get an abortion, but she has no money and her mom and sister are broke. Matthew offers to pay for it by taking the TV repair job.

It's never too late to abort your 17 year old daughter.

In her room Maria tears all her posters off her wall; thus, abandoning her old lifestyle. She puts her mattress in the guest room for Matthew, who's fixing Peg's TV. Peg tries to get Matthew to watch some TV with her in her room -hint hint- , but Matthew thinks TV gives you cancer. Maria shows Matthew his room, and he's silently flattered by Maria sacrificing her bed for him. He convinces squinty Maria to wear her prescription glasses that she never wears because she doesn't want to look like a librarian, but Matthew likes librarians. They almost kiss, but Maria backs off and asks for Matthew's grenade. She's puts it in her drawer. Downstairs Maria's mother tells Matthew to back off Maria, and that he can only stay for a night. Before Maria goes to bed she writes in a tiny notebook that she's ashamed of being young and stupid.

The next day Maria talks about having kids with Peg and friend. They never thought to plan their teen pregnancies and never thought about what life would have been like if they didn't have babies. They seem content in their vapid motherhood yet also miserable. Hello society.

Now Maria is settling into her new job running a drill press, while Matthew settles into his new job fixing TV's. After work they meet up, and Maria is already over drilling holes and thinking about learning to type. Maria also is trying to hunt down the husband of the woman whom she met on the bench. The woman had mentioned which train he took and his style of dress, so they stake out the train stop, but all the men getting off look the same.

White men. White problems.

At Maria's that night Matthew sticks around much to the chagrin of Maria's mom, who's hellbent on having Maria support her for the rest of her life. The mother's mania is starting to wear on Matthew. Maria gets further evidence from Peg that mindless marriage seeking is a path to nowhere. Then Maria's mom gives Matthew the fifth degree on his relationship with Maria and tries to pimp Peg off to him like she's next best thing since birth control. There's some strange Peg fellatio inuendo with a cigarette. Matthew's not interested. His wide eyed glowering to the mother's creepery is a sight to behold.

Glower power.

After the maternal creepshow, Matthew tries to talk Maria into leaving, but she's two busy trying to figure out how his grenade works. Matthew takes her to school and offers his bed to her, but Maria just wants to become a nun and be numb. Matthew compares numbness to death and asks her if that's really what she wants. Suddenly their thoughts of death subside, perhaps now they have something to live for, each other. They kiss for the first time. Maria asks Matthew to accompany her on her trip to the abortion clinic. Slightly irked Matthew agrees.

You thought there was malt liquor in this?

The next day at the clinic Matthew is all nerves. The fact that some jerk put Maria in this situation is raising his urge to kill. He offers to marry Maria. Crazy talk. Maria tries to calm him down before she heads to the back. After she leaves, a resident abortion daddy stops over to try and relate. This guy breaks it down. To him each abortion gets easier to handle than the last. It's the ultimate problem solver. Nice. Matthew tries to kill him with his bare hands. Maria hears the ruckus and rushes to break it up.

Outside, still pregnant, stopped at visual and metaphorical crossroads, Maria and Matthew mull over getting married and what love means. They settle on trust, admiration and respect equaling love. Maria tests Matthew by falling backwards off a ledge. He catches her. She trusts him. Well, that's one way to fall in love. She wants to do the same thing for him. Matthew doesn't think it's a logistically good idea. He's too heavy, but Maria insists. Matthew declares that he'll only do it if Maria leaves her psycho mom, but before they can settle it they fall back into the hunt for the crazy lady's husband.

Falling in love?

Meanwhile, Maria's mom tries to pimp the idea of banging Matthew to Peg. Devious. At the old computer repair warehouse Matthew tries to get his old job back, so he can take care of Maria and the baby. He promises no more Mr. Mean Guy and ends up with a lower paying position. Mr. Slaughter tries to hunt down Matthew at the TV repair joint, but finds out he's been fired. Maria drills vocabulary words into her head as she operates her drill press. After work she finally finds the crazy lady's husband and swipes his address from his briefcase. She pays back the money his wife gave her back at the liquor store.

Back at the computer warehouse Matthew calls out management for insisting on using faulty parts in their computers. The company wants the computers to eventually fall apart, so people will buy more computers. Fuck you, capitalism! After work Maria tries to tell Matthew about her plans to quit drilling and go back to school, but work has driven Matthew to watching TV and drinking beer just to numb himself. Maria doesn't like Matthew's sudden change in character and wants him to quit the job, but Matthew needs the job so he can help support her and the baby. Dilemma.

While Maria runs off to get groceries, Maria's mom and Matthew get into it. She wants him out, but Matthew and Maria are getting married Monday. Desperate, her mom sets a trap for Matthew by challenging him to a drinking contest. If he loses he'll get out of Maria's life. Confident in his drinking abilities, Matthew agrees. While getting bombed, Matthew reveals that his mother died while giving birth to him. So he killed a parent too. He eventually passes out, and Maria's mom plants him in Peg's room sans clothes. She also leaves her hair clip on the TV. When Peg comes home, she notices that her mother's gin bottle has water in it. The BITCH. When Peg sees Matthew in her bed she tries to put some moves on him, but he's too gone to do anything.

To rape or not to rape? That is the question.

While Maria's out she runs into her abortion clinic nurse friend, and she tells her about all the changes that's been going on in her and Matthew's lives. She doesn't want Matthew to change for the worse because of her, but sometimes you can't help it. She decides that she's going to go through with her abortion. She also runs into her ex meathead boyfriend. He tries to smooth things out with Maria, but when he tries to get physical Maria leaves his cheese in the dust. When she arrives home, Maria's mom tells her to go grab her hair clip from Peg's room. Maria gives her mother no reaction to what she saw. Her mother checks in on Peg and sees her and Matthew passed out together in bed. It looks bad, but nothing happened. Maria showers upset.

The next day Maria goes through with her abortion. Hungover at work, Matthew tries one more time to bring up the issues with the faulty part being included in the companies new product model, but the money grubbing higher ups don't care. So he quits. Maria then confronts the women who stole the baby, but she's already returned it.

Back at Maria's Matthew gets a visit from his old man. He tries to talk Matthew into coming back home, but he's a dick. Mr. Slaughter keeps bad mouthing Maria, and Matthew explodes. They brawl all over Maria's kitchen until a stalemate is reached. Maria's mom and Mr. Slaughter hit it off. When Maria arrives, Matthew tells her that he quit his job, so they can skip town and raise her child away from their crazy parents. He also tells her that he woke up in Peg's bed. Maria lets Matthew know about her abortion and tells him that she doesn't want to get married. Matthew is broken. He gives her a thesaurus and leaves. Maria checks on the grenade. It's missing.

Sadness warshed over the dude.

Maria tries to find Matthew and just follows the sirens to the computer warehouse. Everyone is running for their lives and no one's man enough to go in and try and talk to him. Maria goes in without batting an eye. She finds Matthew with pin pulled. The grenade hasn't gone off... yet? Maria takes the grenade and tosses it. Just when they think they're safe the grenade blows. On the floor in a yin yang looking into each other's eyes, they affirm their feelings for each other - ROMANCE~! The cops then haul off Matthew in a cop car. Both look of at each other as they get dragged further and further apart. Maria puts on her librarian glasses to get one more look at the man that taught her how to see. She stands alone a stronger wiser woman.

Visual metaphor sighting.

REVIEW:

When I first saw Hal Hartley's TRUST, I couldn't help but identify with main character, Matthew Slaughter and his eternal struggle with selling out his principles for a steady job. I was in my early 20's living at home with my mom and step-dad. I was pretty much unemployed and surly having just finished a two show stint working as a production assistant on what I considered to be America's lowest form of entertainment, reality shows. While the people I worked with were nice, both shows were centered around the main participants being lied to just so viewers could take pleasure in watching people be manipulated and not in the PUNK'D sense. I wanted to be a part of the entertainment industry, but I didn't want to be a part of that. But a part of it I was, and disenfranchised I became.

Captain Surly Pants some years before watching TRUST.

Like Slaughter, I was single and alone living with my parents. My last girlfriend cheated on me. All of my old friends had moved to bigger towns. My parents were never oppressive, but I held away in my room just so I wouldn't be a bother to anyone. All I had was film and books. I immersed myself in both, hoping to someday to emerge as a writer/ director - daring to dream. So you can imagine how I felt when I got to meet Matthew Slaughter, the surly, intelligent, moralistic, living at home loner/ bad ass. A new hero was born.

Everything about the film grabs me: the surreal violence, the parents as controlling villains, the connection and affect that both characters have on each other, the story of Maria losing her ignorance is bliss approach to life and entering her own age of enlightenment, the sacrifices Matthew is willing to make just to get Maria out of her living situation. You feel for everybody, and you thank the gods that somebody out there actually made a movie about what it's like to be alone in search of just one person you could relate to.

TRUST is a movie for lovelorn, world weary, tv hating loners that plays like a long satisfying first drag of a cigarette. It's my antidepressant that I'll go to whenever I'm feeling out of step with society, and one of the flicks I tend to show people in the getting to know me process of a relationship. It's the ultimate litmus test. If you get this movie, chances are you'll get me. If you haven't seen it and if any of my ramblings have struck a chord with you, hunt it down. It's cinematic viagra for the soul.